Now, however, you rarely hear of UFO reports and look at the condition the climate is in. We have more floods and hurricanes and blizzards and tsunamis than ever. Coincidence? I think not.

My theory is that that first wave of UFO sightings was for reconnaissance. They took in those couples just to see how they were made. Once they had had a good look, they let them go and they ran to the TV stations and talked their bloody heads off. In time, the aliens either found out all they wanted to know or got tired of the people turning up on the talk shows. Either way, they stopped abducting people.

However, the aliens decided that they would like to move to this planet. I don't know whether it was because their place was getting overcrowded or they just liked the look of Earth. Anyway, they wanted to get in. The trouble was the immigration laws. If they had come a few centuries earlier, they probably could have settled in any country they chose but, now that most of the planet was settled, all the major countries had set up stiff immigration requirements. Only a handful of aliens could get green cards and even those were limited to a few month's stay.

A full scale invasion of the planet apparently was out of the question. Presumably, the aliens had seen the movies about that and realized it wasn't practical.

The alternative was to make Earth so inhospitable that the humans were willing to give it up. What better way than by making it chilly in Miami and threatening to melt the polar ice cap and flood lower Manhattan? A few years of that and people would be willing to move anywhere.

The next step, I suppose, is the evacuation of the Earth. I don't know how we'll do it. We don't have but a handful of space shuttles and none of them has been to another planet much less to another galaxy. Even if we could get away, only a few people could crowd into the shuttle. It probably would be filled with weight lifters and movie starlets. They wouldn't want old people going because they couldn't be counted on to start a new civilization.

My guess is that the aliens plan to move the people out themselves. They haven't showed up with a lot of UFOs before because they were only scouting our planet, but they probably have thousands ready. Otherwise, how would they land their people here?

I'm figuring that, when the time comes, they will bring down millions of their kind and take back as many human people as they can cram into their space ships. In effect, they will just swap the population of Earth for that of wherever they come from.

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